From MP3 Grillz to Michael Jackson’s Pet name: Daily Mail Links

I LOVE the Daily Mail.  I seriously start my day by getting my fix of British tabloids.   So here are my favorite links of the day:

1. Michael Jackson’s pet name for himself was “turd.”

2.   Honey Honey Boo Boo Child (aka Alana from Toddler’s and Tiaras) is getting her own TLC Reality Television show!!!!  If you are out of the child pageant circuit, this video will catch you up (it’s worth it):

3.  The family of a man who died in a threesome was awarded $3 million because his doctor did not warn him against extreme physical activity.  Because a doctor’s warning was totally gonna stop him…

4.  Grillz 3.0 – you can now play MP3’s through your teeth and this is somehow a growing trend.  The control panel is on the roof of your mouth, so you can change the music with your tongue…  U.S.A! U.S.A.!

Daily Mail, you are the best!

Carmageddon causes traffic nightmare and … more babies ?!?!

Predicted as one of the biggest traffic nightmares that Americans ever had to face, Carmageddon was the shutting down of the 405 freeway in a key area of Los Angeles, between the Valley and the West Side.  It was suppose to cause ten hour commutes, insane amounts of road rage and, of course, anarchy.

WELL, I SURVIVED IT… and to be honest it was a little bit anti-climatic.  Most people chose not to travel that day and to instead just stay home.  I used my “off-time” to watch an entire season of Breaking Bad. It was glorious.

Well, two of my favorite news sources, the local news and The Daily Mail, are now reporting that Carmageddon had some unintended consequences… More Babies!  9 months later there has been a mini-baby boom in Los Angeles. This has been reported solely through anecdotal evidence.

A couple, Natasha and Brian Mills have even come forward saying that there baby was conceived during this time.  Brian Mills said: ‘We just holed up in the house, kind of sat by the fire and hung out with each other. ‘Natasha Mills added: ‘And the rest, I don’t have to say.’

Whether true or not, there’s nothing more romantic than conceiving your baby during a state of extreme traffic backup where one becomes so frustrated they feel the world is collapsing around them.

Fat Cat in the Mona Lisa! Fat Russian Cat placed in classic pieces of work.

The things that the Daily Mail considers news…  THIS WEEK:  Art FUR art’s sake: Russian artist recreates famous paintings… featuring her very fat cat (their pun, not mine, although I wish I came up with it).

Of prime importance, the cat’s name is Zarathustra.

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The Daily Mail – zombies, pork and uggs – The Top 3 Dumbest Articles This Week

I’ve professed my love for the British tabloid the Daily Mail before when they decided that Fatbooth-ing Victoria’s Secret Models was considered Journalism.  So as a special treat and as an ode to my favorite “news” source, I’ve decided to show their three best un-news articles:

1.  “Zombie George Washington:  How a mad scientist planned to reanimate the first president with lamb’s blood after he died” – LINK

I thought they were writing a review for a book of the ever-popular zombie genre, but then they said this:

The tale of zombie George Washington, revealed by the science fiction blog io9, is reminiscent of the best selling book ‘Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter,’ which recast the 16th president as a combat-hardened vampire slayer. Except Washington’s story is true.

Daily Mail:  this is for real

2.  Ugg boots banned at school after students caught hiding cell phones in the fuzzy footwear – LINK

Anyone remember the Ugg boots and mini Continue reading

Fatbooth-ing Victoria’s Secret models is now Journalism

I’ve been looking for a good news website for a while.  There’s some that I glance at from time to time, but none of them have really stuck.  Except one.  I really should be embarrassed to admit this, but I love the British Tabloid The Daily Mail.

Today, I learned of the woman who had sex with her underage nephew at Thanksgiving, The French government hating on the name Daemon for being too supernatural, and the real house based on the one in the Disney Movie Up! 

Journalism

But yesterday, they had an article so stupid that it seemed like 13 year teen boys had developed the concept.

Victoria’s Secret Models Fatboothed (read it here)

This

For those of you who still haven’t figured out what Fatbooth is, it is an application where you can make someone look really fat.  It’s funny and you can do it on your friends.  It’s taken a while for me to perfect “my FatBooth face”: a slightly agape mouth, an awkward smile and wide, clueless eyes.  It looks horrendous every time (and no I won’t be posting it).

Here’s one more and you can see the rest of the pictures in the article.

I found out today that the Daily Mail was Britain’s first daily newspaper aimed at the newly literate “lower-middle class market resulting from mass education combining a low retail price with plenty of competitions, prizes and promotional gimmicks”, and the first British paper to sell a million copies a day.  At least they knew their market.

Tomorrow: I fatbooth puppies and ask for a journalism prize.